There is new Top Ten List for your enjoyment today. My old repository for previous Top Ten Lists was getting to look a little long in the tooth, so I've made a stylish new blog just for Top Ten Lists called, what else, "Larry's Top Tens".

Here is the inaugural Top Ten List. I should make you click on the new link, but I'll be kind and just post the new entry. As is the case with most of Larry's Top Tens this comes from a David Letterman Top Ten Contest Topic, but is all original Larry humor -- or attempt thereat.

Top Ten Cool Things About Being The New Pope

10. Newly acquired infallibility makes playing EverQuest a breeze!
    
9. 1.086 billion followers make for an awesome game of Simon Says
   
8. Get to pick a new name... leaving old credit history behind
   
7. Get to answer "YES!" whenever anyone asks, "who do you think you are -- the Pope?"
   
6. 10% Pontiff discount at Pottery Barn
   
5. Can now finalize plans for reviving that Spanish Inquisition thing
   
4. After a night-out on a bender can pretend to be sanctifying the ground by kissing it
   
3. Can finally order a change to the clown costumes the Swiss Guard wear
   
2. Can inspire cries of "It's a miracle" by pointing at any old smudge anywhere and claiming it's an image of The Virgin Mary. Oh, wait, anyone can do that.
   
1. Not only can you say your mother is a Saint -- you can make it true!
   

Top Ten Extras

• Never get tired of the shocked look on peoples' faces when you joke loudly, "We Attack At Dawn!"
  
• Riding around in the Pope-mobile perfect opportunity to practice "I'm in a box" mime routine
  
• Whenever bank sends overdraft notice you can remind them of the infallibility thing
  
• Get to wear a robe 24/7 and no one thinks you're lazy

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1 Comments:

Haha! Very funny ;p

By blasianlotus, at April 30, 2005  

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